Adulthood

When I was 50 I was in law school. Actually went as a sort of sabbatical from psychology. I had an interest in things legal - i.e. I was a legal junkie - lived in D.C. and it was more or less unavoidable. So when D.C. opted to revive Antioch as a public law school - I went... Anyway the point is that around then my son, who was not yet a teen, had to write an essay for a class and he chose to write about me - I forget what the actual essay was about but it ended with a sentence like "My mother just turned 50 and she still doesn't know what she wants to be when she grows up!"

How right he was. Now I am 65 - I gave up both the practice of psychology and the law and went back to teaching and writing - activities I did when I was a lot younger - I also market glyconutrients... so am I an adult? To me I am still growing - still making transitions. I moved across the country too - away from all my friends and an almost lifetime of being an east coast person.. why? I was ready for another major transition. Will I stay here? Will I continue writing and teaching? I have no idea and that's what makes life so interesting - we CAN change and grow - right up to death I guess...

Welcome to growing adults

Many years ago I wrote a book called Growing Children and I loved the title for many reasons - mostly as it envisions movement, action and development - I like the "ing" form of words. Now I have started many blogs - all related - and all using the word growing - this one is about adults.

Q: When do we become adults?
A: Who knows?

Whenever I teach LifeSpan Development, I ask this question.

I also ask who decides?

Who gets to define the different "stages" one reads about... When you stop and think about it - you may realize that these labels change over time and the ages included in some of the stages also change.

I like to use the example of "adolescence." It used to be the "teen" years; then it was from puberty to adulthood [hmmm]; now the word is used to describe persons of many varied ages depending on what they are doing or how they are acting....

Part of this ages/stages issue is that we are living much longer than we used to. One of my other favorite other questions to classes is: "How old was Alexander the Great when he was out there conquering the world." He was 20 when he started his first war and he was dead at 32! So most of his life's work was done in his 20's..I am usually saying this to college students who in their 20's are in a classroom and still deciding what their life's work is to be.

So - to get back to the question - when DO we become adults? Is it when we finally decide what we want to be when we grow up? Or is it when we start a "real" job? Or when we take on family responsibilities?

Think about this and we'll continue next time... ciao